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6 Tips for Pooping at Work

When you’ve gotta go, you’ve gotta go. But for a variety of reasons, sometimes going isn’t all that easy. Maybe there’s no bathroom around. Maybe the facilities are disgusting. Or maybe, you’re just freaked out about using a public toilet. If you’re nervous about pooping in your toilet at work, you’re not alone. People do all kinds of crazy things to avoid using the public john.

Here are 6 tips for making pooping a more pleasurable and palatable experience.

TP Overload

Use paper towel and soap to disinfect the toilet seat. Be sure to discard the toilet paper in the garbage can, not the toilet! For extra protection, cover the toilet seat with a generous amount of toilet paper to prevent direct contact with your buttocks.

Squat and Pray

If you don’t feel comfortable sitting on a toilet even after disinfecting it, try squatting instead. This is a high risk, high reward venture. Only attempt if you have strong thighs and exceptional aim.

Form an Alliance

When you’ve got a case of the tummy grumbles, ask your work friends to standby and guard the door. This way you don’t have to worry about others barging in when you’re handling your business.

Hold it in

When you’re using the bathroom and hear somebody walking in, wait until they’ve left the bathroom before dropping your friends off at the pool. This will spare you the embarrassment and your co-workers the horror.

Courtesy Flush

If you’re worried about clogging the toilet, remember to give it an extra flush. In the plumbing business, we refer to this as a “courtesy flush.” This will mitigate the risk of flooding and spare you the potential shame, humiliation and unflattering nicknames.


If the opportunity presents itself, leave the office and find a facility that’s more conducive to a stress free bowel movement. Next time you have some down time, scope out the facilities in your surrounding area. While they might not be as cozy as your toilet at home, you can probably find a better option than the one at work.

Have any other tips? Share them with our readers on Facebook! If you have any toilet issues, call the experts at Levine & Sons right away!

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